[Created] By Chad Payne

Make me a fire

Set me a blaze

Burn the whole world down

But when the ashes fall

We all begin to see

That the dust of the world is what's in our bones

Put there and sowed together with words

Your light is an xray

Exposing all the demons in our blood

I fall to my knees and scream for the rain

The water that I drink is the blood of the son

Washing me clean 

So drown me in a sea

Burn me from the inside out

It's a reminder that all I'm made of

Is by the words of your tongue. 

A Perspective. By Mark Hegeman

        Who am I kidding? I saw it coming from a mile away. That 18 wheeler of "you're not good enoughs" and "not now, but maybe laters" had sideswiped me and I feel like I let it. In my rear view I can replay it so clearly. Horn blaring and lights flashing all the signs for a disaster were present and now I'm here on the side of the road laying in a pool of myself with my emotional entrails in my hands. Is it weird I feel warm? I can feel myself baking in the hot sun. I can feel my heart beating to the beat of the song still playing on the radio. I maybe in the midst of a disaster but I can still find solace and beauty in the breakdown of things. I get to lay what I'm made of out on the table and examine every piece of me that wasn't worth the fight. The autopsy will read like this, he was a fine young man. 5'11 when he wanted to impress someone 5'10 when no one was asking. He didn't die but here he lay in our morgue. His heart still beats but his old life lay on the table. Your smile was shattered in several places, probably do to my attitude. Your patience suffered several lacerations which the doctors believe to be due to the pressure of being with me. I watched all of these conclusions find their place on the report from my ghostly corner, still carrying my heart, still beating to some ghastly tune still playing on the radio. I am silent and still. Still thinking about being better and still laying on the table while the doctors probe and find out more about me than me myself. The funny thing is as empty as I feel, as lonely as you left me, that's where I find peace. You forget that alone is how you met me. I found company amongst the buzzards and as they peeled me back layer by layer just like these lab coats I saw what I was made of, I saw underneath all the bullshit, I was always the man you wanted, you just didn't.

Bittersweet Disposition

To live in a world of hatred

a world of distorted disposition.

Is a challenge in itself. 

But the world revolves around a cause and effect sort of deal.

We all like to blame 

Everything and everyone but ourselves 

But we search for reasons to continue 

Being what we aren't

I sit and ponder this 

Criss-cross style on the edge 

Of a river

Letting the sound of the light brown 

Waves pull me.

No sun is visible, but it's unmistakably bright 

Making me squint my eyes

This place isn't my own

But in that moment I am alone.

The good kind of alone.

Past events that surf through

 my mind 

are lulled away with the rhythm of the tide. 

I normally take longer to 

Recooperate 

This time, I grab my stuff and leave 

Right before the sun sets 

Getting into my car

I start my engine 

And begin to drive back

To I'm not sure where

I then let my thoughts wonder

And I think about having a 

Significant other and 

Long to 

Be held 

And put before almost anything

Except God.

To have someone understand 

My misunderstandings 

And relate to the unrelatable.

But it's all in the hands of God, 

Because I sure as heck 

Don't trust anyone enough 

To take that place in my life 

Yeah I'm single 

And yeah I'll tell you I'm happy

Being a single woman

But it's hard

And irritating.

 But hey, 

It's bittersweet disposition.